Thursday, January 27, 2011

Chapter Twenty-Six: The Mysterious Gift.

Chapter 26

Just because we were in a new relationship, didn’t mean we wanted to drop everyone and everything else and just focus on each other. We had too many friends who had played that card and lost. We decided to go home every third weekend, so that we had two weekends at college and then one at home. We needed to establish and help flourish the relationships we had made at school and we didn’t want to go home every weekend and miss out on those experiences. As we talked each night, we discussed what we wanted our relationship to be like and what we each expected and desired.

When I was 16 years old, all Amber and I thought about was being kissed by a boy. We talked about it constantly and just couldn’t even fathom it actually happening to us. The older I got, and the longer I went having not kissed a boy, the more special “my first kiss” became to me. Going into this relationship with Darin, I was 18 years old and I was to the point where I didn’t want to “waste” that kiss. If I had gone that long without kissing, why not just save it for the one man God wanted for me?

Darin and I both agreed that we wanted to take the entire relationship as slowly as we could – knowing that IF it were to result in marriage, it would be a minimum of four years before that could ever happen, with us being at different colleges. The entire progression of our friendship and relationship had been slow, so we didn’t want to jump in full speed ahead just because we had an official title now. We didn’t want what we had to change whatsoever. We wanted to remain best friends, laughing and growing to know each other on a more intimate level.

I told Darin soon after we became “a couple” that I didn’t want to kiss him. Well, I wanted to kiss him, but I didn’t think it was a good idea. I didn’t want to start kissing him and then have four more years to wait before we could ever get married. I feared that in those years, we would become too comfortable with each other and that could possibly lead to regrets in a physical relationship. Darin told me that it was perfectly fine with him that I didn’t want to kiss. We were completely satisfied with holding hands and gazing into each others eyes. It was completely sweet.

A few months into our relationship, Darin asked when I wanted to kiss. I knew exactly when I wanted to kiss. When I had a ring on my finger. I had waited that long to kiss and I knew that when I got engaged then I would know that this was God’s man for me, and I could give him that token as a precious gift that I had saved. Darin went along with me and respected my desires. People thought we were crazy and people thought we were freaks, but we knew what we wanted for our relationship – and that was to glorify God. No one else mattered. Just me, Darin and God.

On Valentine’s Day, which happens to be one of my very favorite holidays, I wanted to do something extra special for Darin. He planned an elaborate date with several of his friends from college and they made us dinner and took us to the ballet. I would have rather gone on an alone date, since I didn’t know anyone very well, but it was a fun night. When we got back to my house, we exchanged gifts. I handed him a little box with a poem affixed. The poem was titled “A Kiss”. I had written a little poem about how special a kiss is, what it means to me and what it symbolizes. I’m sure at this point he was expecting me to plant one on him, but I urged him to open the box.

Inside, on a tiny piece of velvet, laid a tiny glass kiss (shaped like a Hershey kiss). There was a tiny note inside that read “maybe you can trade this in one day….”

He smiled and gave me that look that I knew meant, “Whitney, I really really really like you” and he hugged me. I couldn’t help but wonder if I would ever see that glass kiss again.